Aka "Dah Tru Gt-Starbai"

I had an idea. I expanded it into a plan. Said plan was executed. Laughter commenced.
A few weeks ago I was on Soundcloud listening to some music when I came across a user with the word "Starba1" in his name. If you're West Indian, you may be familiar with such terminology. If you're not, the let's just say that a "starbai" is often associated with guys who wear Ed Hardy shirts & might say things like "Swag" & "YOLO" in everyday conversation. It's also associated with Guyanese & Trinidadian folks fresh off the boat from wherever they happen to be originating from. Personally, I find this word hilarious as it's probably never been used to describe me. This is why I tend to use it any time I get the chance. Frankly, it just bothers some people to hear. So of course when I saw this user name, my first thought was "I need to change my name to that." Soon after that thought, I realised that April Fool's Day wasn't far away. So I slowed my roll a little bit & plotted.

The first time attempted such Facebook fuckery tomfoolery was a few years ago when I first had a Facebook account on April 1. My brilliant idea was to change my relationship status to "In A Relationship" even though I was still as single as ever (#LonelyTweet, as we say on Twitter). The cutting edge of comedy, right? The main problem with this was that no one really saw that. Plus if you did happen to glance at it, you probably wouldn't think much of it. I mean, obviously I'm the type of guy who has girls jumping at the chance to merely be in his presence. Therefore I needed a way to make sure a few people would be guaranteed to see the name change.

If you keep up with me on the ol' Bookface, you know that ever since I've got my newest phone, I've made it a habit to share pictures. I like to think they're worth a look & the album has gotten a fair share of "Likes". Logically then, if I posted new pictures someone would probably see the name pop up somewhere & as "WTF?" I even thought to tag a few people in the pictures in the hopes that they specifically would wonder who in the blue-hell this character trying to talk to them was. So after 3am on a Sunday morning, I changed the name & even changed my display picture to the most Guyanese picture I had. Then all I had to do was wait.

I didn't get back to a computer until after 9pm. As I hoped, the notifications had a larger number than usual next to it thanks to people who, I assume, got the joke. I don't know if anyone found it as funny as I did, but I genuinely don't care. When Tru-Def told me the story of her waking to up see some Coolie guy trying to talk to her I fell onto the couch in hysterics & proceeded to smack my head on the wood of the arm rest. Laughter numbed the pain though. Apparently she was about to delete me until she went to my timeline & figured out that I was pretty much the only person she knew who would have that 1 Love T.O. picture. I can only hope that everyone else had a similar reaction. Not a bad gag for a few seconds of typing.

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