Keep Your Gift

I've recently been asked by a few people what I'd like for Christmas this year. The response I've given each of them so far has been the same: "Don't worry about me. I'm good." Being the childish character that I am, I feel like the following question must be asked: "Wha de rass ah gwan?"
It's not like I've gone through years of bad gifts or anything like that. There may have been a few things that I really didn't need, but I've got no complaints. I'll always appreciate the gesture of someone giving me a gift. Even the consecutive years of cologne can't be blamed for anything
; except my success with the ladies. It shows that people care, you know? The thing is, there isn't anything I want. Plus, the things I need can't really be wrapped up. It's not like you can leave a degree in my stocking (although grades do come out on Christmas morning, so I just might be able to lose a degree). I'm not going to get better health in a box, am I? Also, it's apparently rude to give cash as a gift for Christmas (To which I say: "Bah humbug!").

In short, to anyone planning on sending a gift my way, I'm accepting the same amount of love I get every other day of the year. If all you feel you can do is dap me up, then make that happen. Shoot, I'll be happy if you just pass me by & nod. Whatever you do though, don't feel like you have to go out of your way & buy me something. If there's serious thought behind it, cool. I mean, if you can manage to reference a joke, go for it. Those are always my favourite gifts. But other than that, I promise you that I'm okay in the material possessions department. I'm just going to get that glorious Leafs hat (above) for myself & call it a holiday. Thanks in advance for respecting that. Side-note: This no-gift business doesn't necessarily apply to my birthday. We'll see what the Boxing Day sales are like. Still though, some of you better get to work on that one.

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