Your best friend is taking a nap on the floor of
your living room. Suddenly, you are faced with a bizarre existential
problem: This friend is going to die unless you kick them (as hard as
you can) in the rib cage. If you don’t kick them while they slumber,
they will never wake up. However, you can never explain this to your
friend; if you later inform them that you did this to save their life,
they will also die from that. So you have to kick a sleeping friend in
the ribs, and you can’t tell them why. Since you cannot tell your friend the truth, what excuse will you fabricate to explain this (seemingly inexplicable) attack?
"Why did I kick you? Here's a better question: Why are you sleeping in the middle of my living room? Yelling didn't get you up. Shaking you didn't work either. I'd have poured some water on you, but I didn't want to seem rude. So I kicked the hell out of your ribs. You're welcome."